Relationships
Individual therapy for women in a relationship or going through a breakup or divorce
How can something once so joyful now bring so much pain?
You haven’t felt loved or appreciated in a long time. Just one smirk or scoff from your partner, and you’re instantly triggered.
“What is that supposed to mean?” you ask. All you said was that your partner bought the wrong milk, and here you are, in a heated argument within milliseconds. “Nothing is ever good enough for you!” your partner says angrily. You respond defensively, “Well, maybe if you for once asked me how my day was!”
There is so much resentment and tension. This is about so much more than milk. Below the surface, you’re screaming for connection and feeling rejected, ignored, and unseen.
You’re dismissed when you bring up your concerns, and it usually just becomes a “tit for tat.” It feels like your partner just doesn’t care about how you feel anymore. You long to be heard, known, and understood, but it seems that your partner doesn’t see your heart.
Perhaps you’ve thought about just walking away, but then you feel so guilty… or afraid there’s nothing better out there for you… deep down, you may fear that you really aren’t lovable, and this is the evidence.
Do you feel blamed, distant, and angry when all you want to feel is close, connected, and valued?
Sometimes it gets better for a while, but…
The same negative cycle keeps repeating itself – the same old pattern of feeling disconnected, reacting, and then withdrawing.
You try to make an effort… maybe it’s just offering a smile… but when it goes unnoticed or gets misinterpreted, you wonder why you even bother… you get snappy, then pull away and shut down.
Let’s talk about the stress of an unhealthy relationship…
We both know the toll it can take – both emotionally and physically.
Few things are as painful as feeling unloved by your partner. Your heart aches with sadness, and you feel so empty and alone.
You find yourself unfocused at work and irritable with the kids.
Your body hurts all over, and you’re so tired.
Therapy is a good idea at any stage of a painful relationship.
Are you in the relationship now?
You may have asked your partner to go with you to therapy, but they’re unwilling. I want to tell you about the power of ONE! It only takes one person to change the cycle.
Consider that you can begin to change the way you show up in the relationship by going to therapy. Taking the risk to work on yourself and the way you understand and communicate with your partner, even when it’s not being reciprocated right away, takes courage and vulnerability but can lead to powerful change!
Are you looking to end the relationship?
Or maybe you need help deciding if you should stay or go. You love your partner, but you know your dynamic is unhealthy (maybe even toxic or abusive). Perhaps you’ve done the work of change, but your partner doesn’t meet you there. You may have some tough decisions to make to honor yourself. Even if the relationship ends, you’ll learn so much about your own patterns in relationships to not repeat them.
Have you ended it but need to heal from the relationship?
Maybe you worked hard to save it, and leaving really was the last option. Whether it was you or your partner who called it quits, your world has fallen apart, and the grief is all-consuming. You wonder, “Why does it hurt so badly even when the relationship was so frustrating?”
There are so many losses… all your dreams and plans. Now what? You’ve never experienced this kind of stress and heartbreak before. You can’t stop crying, and you feel so guilty and alone. Your whole life has been affected: your daily routine, your responsibilities, your joint friends, your home, and your kids. You’re not even really sure who you are anymore without this relationship.
It’s time to work on you.
Let’s get honest about what happened in this relationship, understand the dynamics involved, and where things got off track. You’ll start to understand the painful cycle that pulled you two further and further apart, both from yourselves and each other.
I’ll help you get in touch with how you feel deep down and learn new ways to express your truth that won’t elicit the same negative cycle, whether it’s in this relationship or others.
As you heal, therapy can also help you develop an identity separate from the relationship – to know who you want to be in the world – guided by your values, beliefs, and opinions. You’ll observe your limits and practice asserting them. You’ll learn how to nurture yourself and meet your own emotional needs.
As you become more accepting of yourself, you’ll be able to share more of yourself with others. You’ll be able to love more freely and release yourself from the pressure of trying to control others’ perception of you.
You CAN have fulfilling relationships securely rooted in respect, trust, and deep emotional connection!
Will it be “one day” or “Day One”?
Therapy is an opportunity to mend your heart and heal from the past while changing the course of your future.
Let me help you confront your fears, learn more about yourself, and experience relationships in a whole new way.
Give me a call at (916) 705-2896 or email hello@fullcupwellness.com to get started with your free 20-minute consultation.