Relational Trauma Therapy
Individual therapy for women healing from complex trauma from caregivers or partners
In person in Roseville, CA, and online in California, Florida, and Mississippi.
You adapted to survive.…
Maybe you wouldn’t describe your experiences as traumatic. Maybe there wasn’t one overwhelming event. Instead, it was years of subtle experiences that taught you how to survive important relationships. You may have learned to put your own needs aside, keep the peace, and care of everyone else. Or, you may have learned to stay on guard, strive for perfection, expect disappointment, or protect yourself before someone else could hurt you.
These adaptations helped you survive. And… they may not be serving you anymore.
Whether your instinct is to people-please, withdraw, become defensive, or stay constantly on guard, these patterns often share the same root: relationships that didn’t feel emotionally safe.
This is often called relational trauma or complex trauma and instead of developing from one traumatic event, it develops gradually through repeated distressing experiences with caregivers, partners or other important relationships. Over time, those experiences shape how you see yourself, others and the world around you.
Healing begins with understanding how you adapted, recognizing that those adaptations once protected you, and gradually reconnecting with yourself. I would be honored to help you do that.
We’ll honor the ways you’ve learned to survive while gently challenging the patterns that no longer serve you.
Was it really trauma?
One of the hardest parts of healing relational trauma is recognizing it for what it is.
You may tell yourself “it wasn’t that bad.” Or, feel guilty for complaining because you knew your parents loved you.
But trauma isn’t defined by how dramatic an experience looks from the outside. It’s defined by how it affected you.
If your relationships leave you questioning yourself… if saying ‘no’ fills you with guilt… if you constantly put others first, get defensive easily or struggle to trust… your experiences deserve to be understood, not minimized.
Naming these experiences as relational or complex trauma isn’t about blaming the people who hurt you or getting stuck in the past.
It’s about finally making sense of the patterns that may have confused you for years.
Once we understand where those patterns came from, we can begin changing them.
How can therapy help heal complex relational trauma?
Healing from relational trauma isn’t about forcing yourself to relive painful memories. It’s about understanding how your experiences shaped the protective patterns that helped you survive, and gently creating new ways of relating to yourself and others.
We begin by creating safety. We’ll build the skills to help your nervous system feel more settled, regulate difficult emotions, and stay connected to yourself during challenging moments.
As trust develops, we’ll begin getting to know the parts of you that learned to survive. The part that keeps everyone happy. The part that stays on guard. The part that pulls away before someone can hurt you. The part that becomes angry to protect the hurt underneath. Rather than trying to get rid of those parts, we’ll understand what they’ve been protecting and help them discover new ways of responding.
Over time, the goal isn’t simply to reduce symptoms. It’s to help you trust yourself again, build healthier relationships, respond instead of react, and reconnect with the woman underneath the survival strategies.
What to expect in relational trauma therapy?
Your story deserves more than a one-size-fits-all approach to healing.
My first priority is helping you feel safe enough to do this work. We’ll take time to build trust, understand what brings you to therapy, and create a space where you can show up honestly without fear of judgment.
We’ll take the time to understand your story and discover how the experiences you’ve lived through may still be influencing your thoughts, emotions, relationships, and sense of self today. Whether you’re navigating a difficult relationship, healing from one that’s ended, or simply wondering why certain patterns keep repeating, gaining understanding is often the first step towards self-compassion.
There isn’t a checklist or timeline we’ll follow. Some sessions may focus on building insight. Others may focus on building practical skills, processing difficult experiences, or exploring what’s happening in your life now. As your needs change, therapy changes with you.
I’ll continually tailor our work to your goals, your readiness, and what will be most helpful for you.
Is relational trauma therapy right for you?
Relational trauma therapy may be a good fit if you:
- Grew up feeling like you had to earn love, approval, or acceptance.
- Often put other people’s needs ahead of your own.
- Struggle to trust your thoughts, feelings, or decisions.
- Feel guilty setting boundaries or saying no.
- Find yourself in emotionally unhealthy or one-sided relationships.
- Wonder if you’re “too sensitive” or expecting too much.
- Feel disconnected from yourself or unsure who you are outside of caring for others.
- Want healthier relationships without losing yourself in the process.
My approach to relational trauma therapy
I don’t believe healing happens by simply learning some coping skills or talking through memories. I want you to understand how your experiences led you to protect yourself, develop the skills to navigate life differently, and reconnect with the part of yourself that have been buried beneath years of survival.
My work integrates several evidence-based approaches including Internal Family Systems (IFS), Emotionally Focused Individual Therapy (EFIT), Cognitive Processing Therapy (CPT), Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). My tool box is vast and I pull from multiple different sources to tailor the treatment to exactly what you need.
My goal isn’t simply to help you manage symptoms. It’s to help you understand yourself with compassion, trust yourself, and build relationships where you no longer have to lose yourself to feel loved.
Relational Trauma Therapy in Roseville, CA and Online
If you’re ready to stop surviving and begin reconnecting with yourself, I”d be honored to walk alongside you.
I provide in-person relational trauma therapy at 1700 Eureka Road, Suite 155, Roseville, CA, 95661, serving women throughout Granite Bay, Rocklin, Loomis, Lincoln, Folsom, and the greater Sacramento area. I also offer online therapy for women throughout California, Florida and Mississippi, making care accessible for you.
Whether you’re healing from complex trauma, emotionally immature parents, narcissistic abuse, or other painful relationship experiences, you don’t have to keep carrying the weight of old wounds into every relationship. There is a way back to yourself.
You've been carrying this long enough.
Don't put this off any longer. Give me a call and let's get started.Give me a call at (916) 705-2896 for a free 20-minute consultation.
Frequently Asked Questions About Relational Trauma Therapy
Do I need a PTSD diagnosis to receive trauma therapy?
No. Many women who benefit from relational trauma therapy don’t meet the criteria for a PTSD diagnosis. Instead, they’ve lived through years of unhealthy relationships that changed the way they see themselves and relate to others. If you think those experiences may still be affecting your life, your relationships, or your sense of self, therapy may help.
What is the difference between PTSD and complex trauma?
PTSD often develops after a single traumatic event, while relational trauma or complex trauma develops through repeated experiences over time, especially within important relationships. Many women carry the effects of complex trauma without ever having received a name for it. Both are real, both deserve attention, and both can respond well to therapy.
Is relational trauma therapy painful or retraumatizing?
Healing from relational trauma can bring up difficult emotions at times, but therapy should never feel unsafe. My role is to help you process painful experiences within the context of a safe environment while helping you build the emotional resources needed to move forward. The goal isn’t to relive the past. It’s to reduce its impact on your life.
Do you offer online relational trauma therapy?
Yes. I offer secure online therapy for women throughout California, Florida, and Mississippi. as well as in-person sessions in Roseville, CA. Most of my clients find telehealth to be just as effective as in-person therapy while offering greater convenience.
How much does trauma therapy cost, and do you accept insurance?
I’m an out-of-network provider and do not bill insurance directly. I do provide a Superbill after each session, which you can submit to your insurance company for possible reimbursement. Many PPO plans reimburse a portion of therapy costs. I also accept HSA and FSA funds. I’m happy to answer any questions about fees during your consultation.
How do I know if you’re the right therapist for me?
Finding the right therapist is one of the most important parts of the healing process. That’s why I offer a complementary 20-minute consultation. It’s a opportunity for us to talk about what’s bringing you to therapy, answer your questions, and help you decide whether working together feels like the right fit. Schedule a free consultation. →
About Full Cup Wellness
Full Cup Wellness is a private therapy practice in Roseville, California, founded and led by Dr. Holly Spotts, Psy.D., a licensed clinical psychologist with over 20 years of experience. The practice specializes in therapy for adult women navigating anxiety, depression, trauma, relationship challenges, and the unique pressures of modern life. Sessions are available online throughout California, Florida, and Mississippi, and in person in Roseville. Voted Best Mental Health Professional from 2020 through 2025.
Full Cup Wellness does not provide crisis services. If you are experiencing a mental health emergency or are in immediate danger, please call or text 988 (Suicide and Crisis Lifeline) or go to your nearest emergency room.